In our readings today, we read a story about a couple who showed no affection in their marriage with the exception of sex. I personally cannot imagine what this would be like, but I think some of you readers can. The personal rejection felt can create such a deep emotional wound.
This is one area of our marriage we have never had issues with. In fact, our kids often ask us to “get a room” if we are hugging or kissing in front of them. It is never passionate affection, just good old fashioned kissing. We hold hand often, as often as we can. If Scott walks past me, he usually kisses me on the cheek, pats my shoulder or even better pinches my bottom. That really makes the kids squeal. The point is, our children understand that this type of affection is ONLY appropriate in a marriage relationship. It is part of it.
Scott & I also have an unspoken rule between the two of us. We must tell each other “I love you” at least once a day, and we much kiss at least once a day(that one is easy). It is amazing to us how many times we are going about our day & will realize late in the day we have not told each other we love them. Even when I am mad at him, I say it…because it is true!
In chapter 5, I like how each person in the story took their problem to their prayer partners. That is so strengthening to allow others to pray for you and hold you accountable. It is important that we run to the Lord in all things, but what a blessing it is when he has placed godly people in our lives who can pray for us and encourage us. If you don’t have anyone like that, ask the Lord to give you someone. He will, he knows how important the encouragement & comfort of others is to us.
If you are married to a man who struggles with giving affection, your prayers & not your complaining is what he needs. The example given by Patti and Tom is biblical. There may be some areas of your life that the Lord needs to clean up before he begins to work on your husband. Be available to this so that you can experience marriage as God created it to be.